What Was That?: Oh movies, how you love to ruin books.
Plotsies: In a society run by elders where no one feels so there’s no war or anything, youths are assigned a job in the community. Jonas (Thwaites) is selected to work with The Giver (Bridges) to preserve all the memories of the world before/outside of the community. Jonas soon wants to give his memories to everyone and goes rogue looping in Fiona (Rush) and Asher (Monaghan) in defying the Chief Elder (Streep).
Stop Talking: The dialogue was the worst. They had to figure out how the people in this society would talk and the boat is missed big time. They all sound ridiculous when they speak and even Streep and Bridges couldn’t save all of their lines. Bridges is great in everything who am I kidding There’s only so much bad writing that acting can cover up. Although, good for you Thwaites in holding your own in the scenes with Bridges. Rush was as charming a Fiona as possible as well.
The Concept: The concept was totally there and it started out as something super cool! I was so excited to see what they did with this. Strike One: T. Swift should not be acting and thank god the role was small. Strike Two: Just because people don’t feel doesn’t mean they would sound like robots. Strike Three: It was a weird cross between a bad Star Trek and Stepford. It was cheesy and I was kind of upset.
Overall: It’s a great concept illustrator for kids, but as someone a bit older I was left wanting a bit more. Womp Womp. Just confirms, stick with the book.
Creepy: Just. Creepy.
Creepy Plot: So Clarice Starling (Foster) wants to become a behavioral analyst with the FBI. She gets sent to an institution to interview Hannibal Lecter (Hopkins) who is a psychotic serial killer cannibal person. She becomes involved in his game and obsesses over solving another case. The two main plots going on are so neat and the way they were woven together makes it even better.
Creepy Dude: Way to go Anthony Hopkins. Like…yes. You deserved that Oscar and you are great. He conveyed so much with so little and it was enough to make your skin CRAWL. Fun fact: he only has like 18 minutes of screen time and he won a freakin’ award. Talent my friends.
Creepy Long: Okay, the length isn’t creepy, I just wanted to emphasize that the movie is kinda long, or at least it felt long with some of the slower parts. Every minute is totally worth it, though. I loved the scenes between Starling and Lecter too.
Creepy Overall: Yeah, it’s way creepy, but if you can handle a few episodes of “Criminal Minds” you can handle this. Now I want to watch the sequels!
Sci-Fi Staple: To be totally honest, I forgot this movie existed so it was never on my watch list. I’m not gonna lie, I’ll probably be watching the TV shows now.
The Gate: So this gateway is discovered and Dr. Jackson (Spader) is brought on to go through the gate with a team led by Col. O’Neil (Russell). They arrive at a planet inhabited by a civilization reminiscent of the Egyptians who are enslaved by Ra (Davidson). Ra now wants to destroy humanity on Earth since the gate is working again and Dr. Jackson, Col. O’Neil, and other citizens of the planet work together to try to stop him.
The Concept: I definitely think incorporating myth into sci-fi is cool, but this was a little meh for me. Ancient Egypt is so over-done and branching out into something like Ancient Mesopotamia would’ve been cooler. Let me just say it…the script. Again, neat concept, but some of the writing I had to just ignore to get through the story. Some of the parts with Ra were the cheesiest but in doing some reading, Jaye Davidson was not too excited about being in this movie.
Whoops: Just wanted to point out, you can totally see the camera crew in Russell’s shades in the desert. That is all.
Overall: A neat Sci-fi flick but with some weirdly underdeveloped moments. I think the TV show(s) might be able to bring more to it but I haven’t seen any of it so I could be mistaken.
Wannabe: This was weird. Maybe I missed something or didn’t “get” it, but I definitely feel like this missed a mark that could’ve been so so good.
The Closet: Tanner (Willett) and his best friend Brent (Iacono) are deep in the closet. Brent wants to come out in a big way at prom but instead, accidentally reveals Tanner as gay. The social queens of the school are obsessed over having a G.B.F. (Gay Best Friend) and it becomes a war over Tanner’s affection. Each girl thinks having him will win them prom queen. A rift forms between Tanner and his friends and the queen bees pull out all the stops to prove they are his friend.
So Sad: I think they were aiming for something like “Mean Girls” but fell quite short. It was meh in terms of plot and character depth but I will say I thought Tanner was probably the most realistic. I enjoyed Sasha Pieterse and while the general personas of the other two girls exist, the characters themselves were very one dimensional. Megan Mullally should be the weird mom or aunt in everything. She was a perfect choice. The comedy was there but it was weird. I’m still not sure how I feel about this movie really.
Overall: I’m not even sure why this was on my watch list…probably the same reason I watch PLL. Please don’t judge me. The message, however, is great and if you watch this movie at least take that with you.
Both: Yes I’m going to try to cram both in here because technically this was one movie.
Revenge: The Bride is attacked by her former employer Bill (Carradine) and she, her unborn child, and her wedding party are left for dead. The Bride survives and begins an epic saga of revenge against the team of assassins she used to be a part of. It’s a weird 70s style kung fu movie from the mind of Tarantino.
Chapters: I like how the story is split into chapters. It works really well and lets Tarantino play with different styles, tones, and approaches. There’s a weird animated sequence but I enjoyed the change-up. Just watch all of them even if it seems unimportant.
Blood and Guts: There’s a lot of this. I know you’re surprised *sarcasm* but most of it was pretty great and necessary. Vernita Green’s (Fox) fight scene was cool but a bit comical, but the others were just like what the eff is happening?? O-Ren Ishii (Liu) is a wimp and has her team The Crazy 88s fight for her first (I see you coward). Budd (Madsen) is irritating and fat but don’t underestimate him. Elle Driver (Hannah) is just needlessly angry all the time and is probably my least favorite character. Then there’s Bill (Carradine) who is just smug and weird and probably the worst actor. Back to the point, it’s a lot of blood.
Overall: Even if you aren’t a Tarantino fan, it’s pretty great. There is a lot of back story that seems irrelevant but it’s all relevant. All of it. Don’t take it too seriously, because it’s cool and I’m mad that it took me this long to see it.
Twice: I actually watched this one twice before posting about it because I could.
The Hero(es): Captain (Evans) returns as an agent working for S.H.I.E.L.D. but soon becomes a part of a much bigger plot. Hydra is back and with a new weapon, The Winter Soldier. Fury (Jackson) and Natasha (Johansson) both play large roles in figuring out the future of S.H.I.E.L.D. and saving the world duh. I loved seeing Peggy (Atwell) brought back along with Maria Hill (Smulders) and also some new faces with Sam Wilson (Mackie) and Kate/Agent 13 (VanCamp).
Plot Building: While I enjoyed the more espionage side of this movie, it all seemed like plot building for Avengers 2. That’s important, yes, but these movies should also be able to stand on their own. I feel like there are a lot of people just getting their feet wet with the Marvel Universe and this one would definitely not be a good introduction to it.
Boom, Action!: The action sequences were pretty great. Each character has their own style of fighting and it’s cool to see each one shine in that way. I think it was cool to see the effort put into more real effects than computerized ones. The after credits scenes are totally worth watching and definitely relate to next Avengers.
Overall: You’ll need to watch Captain America 1 and probably Avengers to really enjoy the movie but it is really entertaining even if you don’t entirely understand what’s going on. I still ship Captain and Peggy just saying.
Unbelievable: I was excited to see Bateman take the director’s seat, and I definitely wasn’t disappointed.
Bad Words: Guy Trilby (Bateman) enters a spelling bee meant for kids. He finds a loophole in the rules and makes his way to finals. He’s sponsored by reporter Jenny Widgeon (Hahn) who tried to understand why he’s doing this. Along the way, Guy makes friends with fellow competitor Chaitanya (Chand). The story follows Guy as he makes his shakes things up in the bee.
The Bee: There’s like two twists in this movie. One I saw coming, the other took me a minute. I was so entertained by the relationship between the kid and Guy that I didn’t care about most of the other interactions. Guy is a terrible person that employs horrific means to get what he wants, so some of his pranks are a bit cringe-worthy. I have to admit he does have some great comebacks and one-liners.
Overall: I enjoyed Bateman’s film director debut. It was a weird premise but the characters were charming and their relationships hilarious. It’s weird and twisted but funny. Worth the rent for a laugh.
Marvel: I had so many theories on what they would do with this movie, and I was not disappointed.
The Guardians: Peter Quill/Star Lord (Pratt) is abducted from Earth just after his mother died. He becomes a ravager and obtains an orb. Gamora (Saldana) wants this orb and Rocket (Cooper) and Groot (Diesel) want Quill for bounty. They all end up getting arrested and must fight together to get the orb back from Ronan (Pace) before he destroys Xandar which is like an Earth ish planet.
Laugh or Fight: Having funny-man Pratt as the leader was iffy for me at first. I thought they would try to make it too “Iron Man” ish but the comedy was taken in a different direction and established Star Lord as a separate type of comic than RDJ. I loved what he brought to the role and can’t wait to see the next installment! Saldana and Bautista kicked some butt although Bautista fell flat on the acting front. Groot and Rocket made a great team too so I loved it. Also LOVED Kaen Gillan as Nebula.
Overall: See it obviously. Marvel knows how to do their movies and this one was no different. Don’t go in expecting something like the “Avengers” because it sets itself apart from that.